I finally have an achievement to share! I have now lost 4 kilos. 3 weeks ago I got sick. Not badly, just enough to feel sorry for myself and have my husband stay home to look after Smidge for the day. And something felt like it changed for me. I just decided I had had enough. And not surprisingly, wishing and hoping to get fitter and healthier just wasn’t cutting it. So here it is…

It has been 3 weeks since I have had chocolate. I am a chocolate addict so this is a big deal. I am no longer addicted and funnily enough, don’t really miss it.

I have started eating breakfast. Since I started making sure that I have eaten I have found that I don’t need a mid morning snack but am ready for something substantial at lunch.

3pm still hits me like a ton of bricks but I have found some delicious yoghurt that tastes likea treat and is only one point on the Weight Watchers system- yay!

And then dinner, which has always been pretty healthy in our household.

I feel like I am eating about 4 times more than I used to, although some days I have to really make myself have breakfast or lunch (bad, I know)

I don’t snack in between these times and all of a sudden the weight is starting to shift. I hope to come back and give another update soon, but in the meanwhile. Here are some cute pics from our life….

The worst part is…I have no excuse. It’s not too hot, I’m not too busy. I have a toddler who would love to go for a walk in the pram each day. He could talk to dogs on his way. He would be in heaven. But instead we go into the backyard and paint and dig in the sandpit and draw with chalk because they are the things I like to do and they are easy. Don’t get me wrong, I love doing those things with him and he loves doing those things with me. But I need to get active. I realised that I have put on about 20 kilos since I finished work to have him. And he is only 20 months old. Yep, I am consistantly gaining weight. Right after I had him I lost heaps of weight. Maybe it was the breastfeeding, maybe it was the fact that I was feeding him so often that I didn’t get a chance to eat, but whatever my reason for losing the weight, I can no longer use it as an excuse for putting it on.

At our meeting tonight, our leader spoke about support. Who or what do we get our support from? For some it is recipe books with low fat, easy meals to make. For some it is a picture on their fridge taken when they were at their goal weight. For some, it is a supportive partner.

I have all of those support measures and they are working great- for my husband. His new size 34s were too big. When I took them back I could only get size 31s. He thought they would be too tight but they are a perfect fit. *Sigh*

So I have had a little bit of an awakening. I am an adult. I am responsible for myself. I should be on my own team right? So what I need most for support is…me.

A freind told me the other day about the 8 year old child we all have inside us. The one that looks at the sink full of dishes and whines “But I don’t waaaaant to do the dishes! I want to watch tv” and stomps away. She told me that sometimes, you need to have a chat to that 8 year old, exactly the way you would if they were standing in front of you. “I know you don’t feel like doing the dishes but if you spend 5 minutes and do them now, the kitchen will be all clean when you come out in the morning and you can go and watch tv without thinking about having to do them.”

I felt a bit strange during the first ‘out loud’ talk that I had with my inner eight year old, mind you I was in the middle of Coles so that didn’t help. Just kidding, I’m not that far gone just yet.

But seriously, I have decided I need to so the things that make me feel good. When I get up in the morning and have a shower, make the bed and put the clean dishes awway I feel great. I make my sons lunch if we are going out for the day and feel a million bucks. So why are there so many days that I drag myself out of bed, only when Smidge wakes up and start my day already behind. It reinforces in me the message that I come second, and not even a close second. Making myself feel good doesn’t even get a look in.

So, what’s the plan.

Well for this week:

• I will be accountable to myself through this blog, I will post, good or bad next Wednesday.
• I will track my eating every day this week.
• I will not buy chocolate in a family block. My family doesn’t have the same addiction issues that I do.
• I will start my day by doing at least one thing that makes me feel like I am starting off on the right foot.

Now, if only I knew how to make myself a star chart on here I would do it. Quite sad really but star charts do work for me. And lastly, and the hardest thing I have had to do for a long time, I am posting a full length picture of myself on here. I will not ever be this big again. And I’m starting today.

This morning I got up early.

Now my son is a nightowl so I am not going to tell you our definition of early, it would just be cruel. But I am up and about while he is still splayed out taking up 3/4 of a queen sized bed (as only babies toddlers all children can)

But anyway…I’m up. My husband is thrilled to not be the only ‘creature’ prowling round the house at this hour (the dog is still asleep too!) I have eaten breakfast, (which in itself is a small miracle), the swim bag is packed, my week is planned, folding has been done, clothes have been taken off the line. So far I have done more this morning than I have the entire weekend

And I think I like it.

I too am a nightowl, I would much prefer to be up into the wee hours of the morning and then get a sleep in the next day. But my life with a toddler doesn’t seem to work that way. I used to be able to get all the household jobs done when my husband and I were home from work, after dinner and a bit of relaxing. Now, by the time my lovely husband walks through the door, I am hanging out for my ‘shift’ to finish, so I can have some time to myself. And after the little sample of me time, there is no way I want to get up and start housework. I pretend I will, but it never happens.

But today is a bright and shiny new day! I have even had time to write about it! So I want to know…am I the first person who has made this brilliant discovery? Where and when are you motivated? Do you think I can keep it up? And please, if you do this, please tell me I can sleep in on the weekends?…

I have had the pleasure of spending the last two days surrounded by passionate, intelligent and gorgeous women. 

I have been attending the Queensland Branch Conference for the Australian Breastfeeding Association.

When I signed up to attend conference I knew a couple of the girls from my local group and a few friends that I had met from the ABA online forum (yep, I’m a geek, I know!) Now, within 48 hours I feel like I have met a team of amazing Mums who I will have the pleasure of working with over the next 10, 20 or 30+ years. They have come from far and wide with all just one thing in common- breasts that have been used for their true purpose. 

Other than that, there is no one thing that defines us. We do not all share the same age, height, colour, age, religion or taste in chocolate (but hey, chocolate is a very sacred private thing, no one choice is wrong. Actually except dark chocolate, that’s just gross)

So I’m wondering, how can a group of strangers with only this in common make me feel so comfortable, so relaxed, so at home? I feel so at home actually that I would like to propose bringing in the men and the older siblings and perhaps converting the conference centre into one, big commune. Maybe I should put that on the feedback sheet?

I am feeling so excited and so inspired by these women and wish every Mum could feel this way when they enter the wonderful world that is Motherhood. The ABA does an amazing job of supporting Mums, from the early day (daze) of that first time your eyes meet your childs and your world becomes so much smaller (and huge-er) at the same time, to the Mum who is up on stage, proudly announcing her sons engagement. For all the parenting stages- rough and smooth, the ABA is there for Mum to Mum support.

A couple of Did You Knows….

• ABA runs a Counselling Hotline that is available 24 hours a day and is a free call. They can even provide information and advice by email. Some months they even receive more than 7000 phone calls!
• The conference is so friendly and relaxed that I could even wear my fisherman pants, my out of the house version of pyjamas- score!
• In 2014 the ABA will celebrate it’s 50th anniversary!
• For only $85 an expectant Mum and her partner/support person can attend a Breastfeeding Education Class. Not only will they get some invalueble insight and information about breastfeeding but included is a year long subscription to the ABA.
• The first weekend in October is Baby’s Day Out, a great chance to get out in public with your bubs and show that babies should be seen and heard.
• The 3-9th of May is National Mothering Week and this years theme is Mothering- Together we do better! What a great chance to get along to an ABA meeting and show your support to other Mums, or get some support from them 

For more info on the Australian Breastfeeding Association see www.breastfeeding.asn.au

So when we heard that Newton Faulkner was playing the Byron Bay Blues and Roots Festival this Easter weekend my DH and I decided to take the plunge and introduce Smidge to the fantastic experience that is Bluesfest. Held at the Tyagarah Tea Tree Farm in beautiful Byron Bay (northern NSW) Bluesfest is a 5 day festival of Blues and Roots music. We decided to just venture down for the one day, Easter Saturday. We couldn’t wait for Smidge to be able to dance along to live Newton Faulkner. This is him playing in an elevator: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjT86g9gTKk&feature=related so you can imagine he is pretty darn good onstage!

And he was. We were quite far back from the stage so it wasn’t too loud but with the help of the zoom lens, we managed to get some pics.

Yes, as you can see, we were quite far away!

The weather was divine!

Smidge spent time walking round like he owned the place!

We enjoyed some great tunes- Galactic, Newton Faulkner, Jack Johnson, Joe Robinson, and even heard Jessica Mauboy doing a cover of Hey-ya! by Outcast- and she nailed it!

And we even managed to get Newton to sign Smidge’s first festival gumboot.

And grab a photo of DH, Smidge and Newton together. Although Smidge was quite concerned about the guy drawing on his shoes. Hehe!

And after a loooong day, it was great to get back to the motel for a good nights rest before the Easter Bunny’s visit. More photos to come later…

Who knew that only 4 days before his schedule heats right up he would be hanging out at a local shopping centre.

His helper was very lovely too, making sure he didn’t careen into any unsuspecting children. She was quick too, managing to jump out of the picture just in time.

Unfortunately, this pic doesn’t show the look on Smidge’s face- a blend of horror and intrigue! Hehe, well he came out smiling in the end, especially when he realised the little egg he had been given was chocolate!

This is currently the little one’s favourite activity.  She has to swing every day when we drop her sister off at pre-school.

Rita – The reality is that the best and quickest way to decrease population, therefore decreasing environmental problems and increasing standards of living, is to educate future mothers.  The more women know, the more they empower themselves and take control of their reproduction and production.  There are many Ritas who have had the guts and opportunity to educate themselves and develop their own voices, but there are many others who need and deserve help and support.

Benazir Bhutto, Mary Robinson, Mary MacAleese, Corazon Aquino – A sample of the women who have reached high political office.  We struggle to get equal numbers or rights in parliaments, it is inspirational that some women can reach the highest levels.

Marie Curie – Of course I have to have a scientist in here!  She worked with her husband in a little shed doing hard physical labour to process ore and isolate radioactive elements.  There were actually many woman scientists at the time but they were only credited with the data collection and illustration, not the qualifications and theories.  Marie Curie was an exceptional woman who had the good luck but also the tenacity and brilliance to be recognised.

Jane Austen – Such acute insight, psychology and reflection in such an unassuming package.  Read her books.  Think about them.  Marvel how well she understood people, the depth and complexity she manages with seemingly simple subjects.  And above all, enjoy them and introduce her to your daughters.  She’s still around 200 years later, somehow I don’t think Stephanie Meyer will be.

Mothers of children with special needs – Mothering is the most important and toughest job there is.  How much tougher it must be with a child who has extra needs.  How much tougher to try to be fair to other children.  How much tougher to find time to look after yourself and your other relationships.  I have no doubt there is also so much joy and love, I don’t see it as a constant sacrifice.  And I am certain there are bad days and things they don’t get right and things they feel bad about or wish they hadn’t done.  But I am humbled by women who do something harder than the thing I find the hardest – mothering.

Breastfeeding Counsellors – I’m sure they don’t always get it right.  I’m sure there are times when personality is wrong, or they make a mistake, or their answer isn’t what the woman ringing wants to hear, or maybe there is no answer.  But mothers of young children who volunteer to answer phone calls at 2am purely to support other mothers are very special women.  As women we have a tendency to pull each other down or not value each other enough.  Volunteers of all types, and especially volunteers who are there for other women, are inspirational.

Who inspires you?

1. Make some one-on-one time with the big girl. The little girl gets some now because of preschool, but the big girl is missing out.  And they both get Daddy time with things like sport, but I need to make some time for just the two of us.
2. Keep commenting on other blogs. I admit it, I’m a terrible lurker.  But I know what a thrill I get when other people comment, so I’m trying hard to engage and comment thoughtfully.  Part of this is to answer emails and reply to people who comment for me – I try to reply on the blog, but I think I need to start emailing people as well.
3. Get the Science@home redesign done. I have a tendency to get something 90% there then slack off.  I’ve done a lot of work on the new site design, now I need to finish off the last bits and get it up there.  (BTW I have one free advertising slot still available if you want to contact me.)
4. Plan my posts further in advance. I think I can keep up with everything, but at the moment I’m planning week by week.  A schedule will let me organise it a bit better and get ahead.
5. Sort the clothes. The house is slowly coming under control, next on the list is the clothes – what we’ve outgrown, what needs to be stored, passed on or binned.  Finding places to put them all!

I think that’s more than enough to keep me busy and establish some new habits.  What are you going to concentrate on in March?  Add your goals and next month we can review them and see how we did.